110 - What I Learned This Contentment Challenge

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Three days ago, I finished, I think my sixth, maybe my seventh Contentment Challenge, where I give up shopping completely for three months at a time. Of course I buy food, I get gas, I get the necessities, but I quit my addiction to Target. I quit Amazon Prime. I quit impulse buys and I focus my heart on living, on doing things, on gratitude.

So many of you joined me this year and I'm so grateful that you did. Now if this is your first time hearing about the Contentment Challenge, go back and listen to episode three of this podcast—one of the very early episodes—to learn more about it, learn how it began, the story of it and how you could do one too, if you wanted, or you can just go here to get some free resources if you feel like you want to learn more.

Today, I'm going to share with you the value of doing this, the value of giving up something in your life that's easy and convenient and even good, to challenge yourself and specifically the value of the Contentment Challenge this year and what I learned this time around.

For the full episode, hit play above or read through it below.


 
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So I want to open this episode with a couple of responses I got an Instagram during the Contentment Challenge, we were all about halfway through when I asked a few people how it was going, and here is what some of you said—

Becky said, "My devotional this morning was about removing the spiritual clutter out of my life. This has enabled me to spend less time focusing on what I want and more on God."

Someone else said "We're saving all of my marketplace money to put towards our mortgage. We put an extra $600 on it so far."

Annie said "Making a running list of wants has been such an eye opening practice. I roll my eyes at myself ." And I agree with her. I did the same thing. It was like, wow. I was rolling my eyes at myself too.

Someone who was just seven weeks into the challenge said "I have replaced shopping and scrolling with reading, and I finished 14 books since the beginning of this year. We've saved $1,200 the first month just cutting back on eating out and groceries and excess shopping."

Brittany said "SO much less anxiety. And we have been okay in the of unexpected expenses. And lastly, freedom from shopping." 

.We all get different things out of this challenge. So I'll be the first one to say, as I share things that I learned, it might not be the same thing that someone else learned. The first time I did this challenge looked very different than the things I learned this time. I mean, like I said, this is my sixth or seventh time. I can't even keep track, but every single time I do it, I've now taken this on as like a personal practice to do every year.

Every time I do it, I learn new things about myself. And mostly I just love the habit switch. I like switch from this consumption habit of buying things, to producing things. Instead of consuming, I'm creating. And I'm sitting in my ideas and thinking about things and creating experiences for me and my kids and my family. So without further ado, here are some of the valuable things that I got from this year's Contentment Challenge. 

First is the value of cleaning out.

Every time I go shopping now, I feel like I need to make myself clean out a room or a closet because I found so many things that I normally would have just bought because I couldn't find them, but cleaning things out really show you how much you have. So here's a quick list of things I found a pair of Milly's gloves. Extra jackets for Beaufort when I thought that we didn't have enough jackets and he was growing out of them. New shirts and sweatshirts for Lyndon, when I thought she didn't have any that fit. Wrapping paper, ribbons and labels and boxes, but like things to make it look really cute, I totally forgot I had. Compression socks that I need for this pregnancy. More toys than we need. Definitely got rid of a bunch of toys, but when we are cleaning out, we found all these missing parts to toys that we were looking for. Clothes. Let me just talk about clothes. I, I rediscovered the clothes that I already have and fell in love with them all over again. And I got creative with them and made new outfits out of them that I've never made before.

I feel like with leaner closet, with clothes that actually fit me and knowing I couldn't buy any more. I really made my closet work for me. And that's hard to do when you're pregnant, but I have, I've just had a lot of fun with the clothing. So I think just the value of clearing things out has really stood out to me this time.

It's like, I want to be more in the habit of cleaning out my stuff and really knowing the things I have in my house instead of just buying out of convenience. 

Alright, next is the value of experiences.

We packed this Contentment Challenge full of really fun experiences. We went to Great Wolf Lodge for a weekend, which was so fun. My husband and I got away to the beach just alone—the two of us—I think for two nights, it was so great. And you know, they have like a great outlet mall down there to the beach we went to, they have all kinds of shopping, but I chose just being on the beach, going for a run, sitting with my Bible and journal for three hours. And it was golden.

And I don't know that I would have chosen those things if I wasn't on the Contentment Challenge. And those are some of my favorite memories from this year, the date nights that we've had. Simple things, going on walks and hikes with the kids, baking with them more, experiences have just taken on this new colorful look to me like this is what I want to be doing with my time and my money. I'd rather spend money on experiences than on things. 

The next thing is really pausing to determine a want versus a need.

So there's value in that, determining a want versus a need. Versus I think we have this habit in our culture is just, "Oh, I need that. Oh, I need that. Oh, I saw that girl post about that shirt. I need that shirt. Oh, I need that. Those shoes." Can I just say we don't need those things. We do not need those things. And the Contentment Challenge has allowed me to like check my heart and say, I need to stop using that language so much because I, I can say I want those things, but I don't really need them.

I really need very, very little. So I thought long and hard before ever making a purchase because the default on the Contentment Challenge is "No, I'm not buying anything." So if something came up that I wanted or felt like I needed,I really had to decipher, is this a want or a need? And if it's a want, I would say no, if it's a need, I would say yes. So for instance, before we went to great Wolf lodge, we had to buy a life jacket for Beaufort, my little boy. And I thought, do we really need this? Well, yes, we did need that. We bought it because he needed a life jacket because he can't swim. And I wanted to make sure that I didn't have to hold him the entire time I was there and that he could freely play in the kid area.

Another one: black pants for Milly. Do we need that? Well, she had one pair of black pants at her school. I was having a hard time washing them and keeping up with washing them in the winter time. So she literally only had the one pair for her dress code at school. So we went out and bought her another pair of black pants because I determined we needed it for her to be able to get the clothes that she needed at school.

And lo and behold, the same day I bought her the new pair of black pants, the old one ripped through the knee. So we're now again, down to one pair of pants for her and I'll go out and get another one soon. But bottom line is, that was what I determined as a need for her and her school. Now, my journal, I shared this on Instagram. My journal is that I was, I was running out of pages of my journal in the Contentment Challenge. And I determined this is a want for me. This is not a need, not like food or clothing. Like this is a journal. But what I realized is that I, I wanted this journal so much because it's for my emotional and spiritual health.

I journal almost every day. And I also give every single one of my kids like, well, the plan is one day to give them their baby book, along with the journal that I filled out in my own personal life from the time that they were born. So this next journal is going to be the journal that I give to my fourth child. And I didn't want to miss like two months of journaling because of this contentment challenge. So I very intentionally went to target and picked out a pretty journal and spent $13 on something that I owned that I wanted in the middle of this Contentment Challenge. And I was happy about that purchase because I knew that it was for a legacy gift for a future child. The child that’s in my belly right now and also for my own spiritual health. And I had total and complete peace buying that on the Contentment Challenge.

So I think just determining what, what is this, is it a want, or is it a need? And then moving forward from there and being confident in this decisions. I really feel like I'm going to take that with me for the rest of this year and the rest of my life.

The next thing is really the value of slowing down in all things.

Slowing down my buying decisions. Slowing down my thumb, pushing that Amazon ‘buy now’ button. Slowing down my food decisions, my meal planning. Slowing down in life. You know, part of my Contentment Challenge, I took like a 10 day solid break from Instagram. One of the best things I did.

I mean, I just sought the Lord, I did a sugar fast during that time. It was like I was on the Contentment Challenge, doing something hard, and I just felt like the Lord wanted me to go deeper. And so I just took a break and just got quiet. And it, I felt like my life slowed down. Like my days got longer.

It was such a gift. And slowing down with the kids. When we're doing these experiences with them and making memories with them, just looking them in the eye and really enjoying it. So, value of slowing down.

The value of stewarding money well.

I mean, my mindset shifted this Contentment Challenge from how much money can we make so that I can buy X, Y, and Z to how much money can we make to give to our churches new building fund or give to these missionaries, or save for a trip to Disney world with our kids or buy a larger vehicle that we need for a family of six?

It shifted from these small daily things that I don't know, make me feel better, or make me happy for a temporary moment to these big picture purchases that are really life enhancing decisions, like memory builders, ministry builders, things that really, I feel like move our life in the direction that we want to be going and that we are—the direction we're headed.

So I think just the mindset of money is just big picture. Like that changed for me again. It changes for me every time I do this, but really this year, it was like, I want to focus our resources on bigger things for us in our family, which is really that's really cool. That's good. Yeah. So it was less about spending it on little things and more about stewarding our money well. 

The last thing that I wanted to share is I was just reminded of the value of a good book.

I had more time for reading and I made it more of a priority and I loved it.

My dad always told me this quote, growing up by Charlie Tremendous Jones,

"You'll be the same person in five years as you are today, except for the people you meet and the books you read."

I love reading. I think reading it's like access to the riches of this world. It's so good to read people's stories, people's perspectives to share ideas.

It is so invaluable to read a good book and that it just reminded me all over again, that if you spend $10 or $12 on a book, it can change your life, but you can spend $50 on a jacket and not want to wear it next month. You know? So just the priority shift of spending and how I spend my time. That's really good.

New to the Contentment Challenge?

Okay, so here's how the Contentment Challenge works, if you're new. If you did this with me, you can tune me out for the next minute, but I just want to explain kind of how it works to someone who might not know. So I do this every January, February and March, the first three months of the year, I do it. I invite whoever wants to come along with me to come along and just say, "Hey, join me to give up shopping." Because I think as a culture, we have this addiction to materialism and convenience that isn't healthy. It's too much. And you can do this completely for free. You don't have to pay anything. You sign up, you get weekly emails, I'll encourage you, you know, follow me on Instagram. I just kind of share about my journey there. Or you can buy, for $15, you can buy my Contentment Challenge Reset, which includes all the emails, but also includes a weekly guide with a devotional, a full-on devotional, activities you can do, verses to memorize and weekly audio lessons for you to listen to.

So you can do it for free really at any point during the year. I mean, you can do it without my help. Just go give up shopping for three months. It's really that simple. Or you could buy it for $15, my Contentment Challenge Reset.

Now I closed the purchases and the signups January through March, because I want to do it as a community, but then I open it up again for the rest of this year. So we'll end this Contentment Challenge on April 10th. And at that point, everything's going to become available again, the Reset, the resources, and you can do it at leisure at any point through the rest of this year, if you'd like to, and then we'll do it again as a community starting in January of next year.

So that's kind of how it works. That's my cadence and rhythm. Would love for you to, to try it, to do it. We'd love to have you do it with us as a group, whatever God leads you to do. That's what I want. And if you're saying this is not for me right now, that is okay. I have had people email me this year and say, “I've been watching you do this for three years, and this is the year for me.” And that is so fine. I just, all I ask is that you pray about it, and that's it.

Thanks for listening to Episode 110 of Work and Play with Nancy Ray, and you can find me @NancyRay on Instagram, almost daily. I'm going to close with my favorite quote on Contentment. I've quoted it before, you may have heard me, it's by Oprah Winfrey. And she says, 

"Be thankful for what you have. You'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never ever have enough.”

Thanks for listening.

 

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