I want to fully trust my kids when I give them their inheritance one day
I want to have incredible experiences throughout this beautiful earth
I want my family to know deeply that the best things in life cannot be bought
I want to live detached from stuff and attached to eternity
I want to give generously
I want to host my friends and my family in a beautiful, paid for home, with quality heirloom pieces, full of the Holy Spirit
I don’t want my kids to have college debt
I want my kids to know that life and work is more than earning money
I want to anonymously sponsor missions trips, Christmas mornings for single moms, and the electric bill for someone making ends meet
I want to share our (future) vacation home freely with young couples and ministries for rest and respite at no cost
I want my last days to be comfortable, free of worry and stress regarding the proper medical care
I want the local church to be supported by the Ray household

I want money to flow through my hands to all the right, responsible, honorable places, like a river. I never want my grip to be tight.

All of this is directly tied to how I am handling my money today.

Our Journey
Will and I have been on quite the journey together in regards to our finances. I grew up living a very wealthy lifestyle. I was homeschooled, I traveled all over the world as a kid, I would buy anything I wanted at any point. Private school, Clothes, Summer Camps and Horesback riding, my own horse, College, Prom Dresses, you name it – it was all paid for.

Will grew up with two hard working parents. They lived below their means, sacrificing to send their 3 kids to a private Christian school (where we met!). Will knew the value of hard work, he had to pay for his own gas and meals out, and he valued each dollar he made.

Y’all. We were a DISASTER.

Well, almost. We were almost a disaster. When we were engaged, we were introduced to Financial Peace University – Dave Ramsey’s amazing 9 week financial class – that CHANGED our lives and our marriage forever.

Fast forward to 2012: We freaking PAID OFF OUR HOUSE! We had lived in an apartment together for 2 years with no AC, no dishwasher, no washer and dryer, terrible neighbors, and mice. After saving up a lot for a down payment, we moved into our first home in 2010. We lived on nothing but a tight budget for 2.5 years, and we paid off our home!!

Be sure to read this post and listen to Our Debt Free Scream on the Dave Ramsey Show!

I’m going to share with you the tools we use to organize our money, but I want you to know something very important:

It’s about your heart, not these tools.

Money will reveal your heart more than you know. Living on a budget and denying myself of so many “wants” (after a childhood getting everything I wanted at any moment), illuminated some icky sides of myself. But goodness I am SO grateful for the journey.

As Dave Ramsey says, the problem with your money is the person looking at you in the mirror! It all has to do with your emotions, your dedication to reaching goals, your heart.

But if you can allow it to shape you into a responsible, generous person – goodness, it’s worth it.

With that said, here are 6 ways we have stayed organized in our finances throughout the years:

1. Financial Peace University – We took financial peace university as an engaged couple (highly recommend!), and we’ve taught it 4 times since then at our church. There’s nothing out there like it. It’s only once a week for 9 weeks, it’s comprehensive AND funny, it hits all the major important things you need to know regarding your finances – including investing and insurance. It literally changed the course of our lives and marriage.

2. Eliminate all debt (yes: even your house!) – Reaching for massive goals together as a husband and wife has really unified us more than we realized. Eliminating debt is a huge goal! Living without debt allows us to breathe easy, not be stressed or angry when a car breaks down or an emergency happens, and allows us to dream big when it comes to the future. I can’t recommend a debt free life enough. It’s so freeing!

3. Our budgeting system – We use two tools for our budget: Everydollar.com and our cash envelope system. Several of our budget items are accounted for as we make the purchase (for instance, I enter the amount of every single grocery receipt as soon as it happens), but some of our items are stored only in cash in our envelopes (like clothing and gifts, for example). Early on, we used cash for EVERYTHING and it helped us so, so much. There were times when I’d ask the grocery clerk to take back 10 items because there wasn’t enough cash in my envelope. Do you think I’d be that hard core with a card? Not a chance!

4. Regular financial meetings – We have a budget committee meeting every month, before the month begins. We have ad hoc meetings when big financial moves are in the works (Christmas, buying a car, looking for a new home). We have an annual meeting with our financial advisor to make sure we are reaching our investing goals as well.

5. $1000 – $5000 in the bank at all times – I’m talking about our checking account here – NOT our emergency fund. Our emergency fund is kept in a separate savings account, and it accounts for 6 months of expenses. In addition to that, we keep anywhere between $1000 and $5000 in our checking account. This is the account that we do LIFE out of! It’s nice to know we can cover what comes our way without stressing out, and it eliminates any need for a credit card.

6. Setting big goals – Yes, this keeps us organized. If we didn’t have goals to reach toward, we wouldn’t be intentional with our spending and saving. I wouldn’t be as motivate to make my business healthy and profitable. We set personal financial goals, as well as giving goals.

Don’t forget to read Emily’s “How we do it” post on finances today, too!

On January 2nd, 2013, Will and I screamed “We’re debt free!” on the Dave Ramsey radio show. The 5-year story leading up to that point consisted of so much sacrifice, so many tears, so much learning… too much to be captured in just a few short minutes on air in a brief interview. I look forward to sharing the rest of that story here, with you.

Listen to our call:

The minute we pulled into the building with the sign “Financial Peace Plaza” out front, butterflies fluttered in my stomach. We’re actually doing this. 

We parked the car. Will was driving, I was next to him, and my sweet mom was in the back seat. We decided to read through our notes one last time, to make sure we had all our facts right.  I proceeded to burst into tears as I read the following:

• $110,000 debt paid off in 32 months. (The house)

• The hardest parts: putting back groceries at the checkout line when there wasn’t enough money in the envelope at the end of the month (this happened regularly); renting a tiny apartment with no AC, no dishwasher, no washer/dryer when we first got married; very limited spending money or “blow” money ($40/month each, which included eating out); making huge payments on the house when we could have gone on vacation/gone shopping/done a whole lotta things; staying content.

• The key to our success: living on a budget (and sticking to it); living on $50,000 budget when our income was over $100,000; leading Financial Peace University (motivation!); contentment.

• Did your friends make fun of you: A little, but most have been converted by now :]

• What are you looking forward to: Giving… to ministries, to families in need, to our church. More grocery money ! Traveling together. Living like no one else.

I couldn’t pull myself together in the car. When I thought about our journey getting to that point, it was honestly surreal that our goal had finally been achieved. No more mortgage payment, ever! It was hard to wrap my mind around it. My mom said a prayer of peace over us – to be calm, to soak in this day, that we would have the words to say. We were both in tears by the end of her prayer. After stuffing tissues in my pockets, we took a breath and stepped out of the car.

We walked inside and greeted Martha, the sweet director of guest relations who also runs a complimentary coffee shop & bakery in the lobby. (Yep, pretty awesome.) She asked about our story, our debt, and she immediately got so excited! She said she was so proud of us, and Dave was going to love our story. We walked around, and Will’s family shortly arrived after that: Liz (mom), Jess (sister), John (brother) & Sam (my bff/John’s wife). We waited, we watched Dave begin the show, and before we knew it, we were putting on our headsets and microphones.

I honestly don’t remember much after that – I heard Dave say our names, and the rest is a blur. I was so excited I didn’t know what to do! My nerves went away during the call, but I didn’t fully know how to express the impact he’d had on us. I was just giddy with excitement, and full of emotion! Will did an awesome job leading much of the conversation. The “questions” we were expecting Dave to ask me never got asked (What was the hardest part? What are you looking forward to?), and honestly Dave just got carried away with excitement! He ran some numbers, showed us how we could build wealth, and then freaked out a little. It was awesome!

•••

Dave: Have you guys even sat down and done any calculations? Because with no house payment, and with this manner of living, do you know how much wealth you can build? Because it will scare you!

Will:  We’ve talked about it a little bit, and we’ve been through Financial Peace, we’ve facilitated it a few times and we love it, but we have not actually let it hit us fully, but I know… it’s massive. It has the potential to be unbelievable.

Dave: Absolutely. So what was the house payment?

Will: About $850/month.

Dave: Okay, and that’s not there any more. So if we just took the house payment, or say, $1000/month, and you just did that from [age] 27 – 67, in a decent growth stock mutual fund, that’s like, 11 Million Dollars.

Nancy: Not bad!

Dave: So if I’m half wrong, you’re still in pretty good shape! THAT’S FREAKING AMAZING!

•••

That part blew my mind. We can absolutely change our family tree with that kind of wealth. We can save lives, pay for our grandkids’ educations, enhance ministries, travel the world, bless so many people, and spend our last days in a comfortable, beautiful paid for home. Unreal.

We finished the rest of the blurry conversation, and Dave said the final words…

“YOU GUYS ARE INCREDIBLE! Will and Nancy, Raleigh, North Carolina, $110,000 paid off but the best part of the whole thing is, they NEVER BORROWED MONEY since they got married except their house and they paid that off early! These guys are freakin’ financial studs! That’s what they are! They’re incredible! Count it down you guys, let’s do our first Debt Free Scream of 2013!”

 We screamed our guts out. Then, I proceeded to burst into tears again.

Will and I hugged and kissed, just enjoying that sweet moment that marked such an accomplishment for us. I then hugged everyone in the lobby, including Martha’s assistant to helped her bake cookies. I was overwhelmed.

Dave came out to greet us and gave us huge hugs. It was so great; I could tell he was so pumped!

After we sat and listened a bit longer to the show, we made our mark by signing “the wall.” Yes, I insisted on drawing a house. (They won’t actually let anyone sign the wall anymore, since the giant wall you see pictured won’t be there forever. They are instead doing small pieces of plexiglass that look pretty sweet, which they will display throughout their office building.)

I’d say 2013 is off to a pretty amazing start. If you commented on my Instagram / Twitter / Facebook, THANK YOU. You do not know how encouraging it was reading all of your comments!

In the next few weeks, I will be blogging a series on the rest of our story – the five years leading up to this point. Will is also going to be sharing his perspective (read his blogpost about our Debt-free-scream here), since our journey was different. (He’s a boy, I’m a girl. Different backgrounds, different spending habits, different views on money at the start.) Our hope is that this will help you and motivate you to set goals and stick with them, to get on the same page as your spouse, and to take financial responsibility for your life this year.

It will take self-discipline and sticking to a plan. And it IS possible.

We can’t wait to share the rest of our journey.