Here’s my philosophy on birthday parties (and parties in general): the more babies I have, the more simple it has to be!

If you’d rather listen to my thoughts, I actually created an entire podcast episode on this exact topic: Listen to Episode 063: Joy-filled Birthdays!

That philosophy has been born out of necessity, but I’m actually growing very comfortable and proud of the fact that I’m not a “Pinterest Perfect” mom. I’m just doing my thing, and I’m very happy with that.

Don’t get me wrong: I LOVE birthday parties. They were big in my house growing up, and I love running with a creative idea! But I’m also very at peace with just letting them be what they are. A few weeks ago when Lyndon turned two, I settled on the theme “Donuts and Dinosaurs!” (She adores both!) We grabbed a few boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts, bought two bags of plastic dinosaurs, bought plenty of snacks, and headed to a park.

(Funny story: Originally I planned to do a dinosaur excavation, aka “throw the toy dinosaurs into the sandbox and let the kids dig,” but when we arrived the sandbox was no where to be found because I was thinking of a different park in my mind, ha!)

All in all, it was simple and great. For each child’s FIRST birthday, I love making it a big deal : Paper Invitations from Minted, inviting everyone, decorating big. After that, I swear by Paperless Post and keeping it simple. I look forward to doing bigger parties / experiences for milestone birthdays, but being the mama who pulls it all together, I gotta think about what’s going to keep me sane!

Here are a few tips to keeping birthdays simple, sincere and special!

1. Use Paperless Post!

   This is my favorite party planning tool. I keep my address book curated and limited to our dearest and closest friends, and I use it for every birthday party. They have amazing, free, customizable options for invitations. It’s easy to manage, to send invite reminders, and to glance and know how many people are coming. You can even send email blasts easily, and I prefer their interface to Evite or other online invitation companies. It’s so helpful!

2. Ask a friend or family member to take pictures and video during the birthday song

   Make up your mind ahead of time to be present, to literally stare at your child and enjoy the wonder in their eyes. It’s much better to see them IRL instead of looking at them through a screen. I’ve done both :)

3. Take it a year at a time, a kid at a time

   Ask yourself these questions: What do they love? What season of life are we in? What is going to stress me out the least and allow me to feel present?

4. Consider milestone traditions

   Think about what you could do with each kid as they turn 1, 5, 10, 16, 18, and 21! We are dreaming of this now, and here are a few that we’ve come up with : some that we’ve borrowed from friends!

   1. One - Big Party at Home

   2. Five - Disney World Trip or a night away in a hotel with just Mom and Dad, sharing a King bed (something we don’t let our kids do at home but would feel so special to them!)

   3. Ten - Trip somewhere in the US, either as a family, or a Daddy-son / Mama-daughter trip

   4. Sixteen - NYC trip to experience broadway, shopping, food, Time Square, etc

   5. Twenty One - International Trip as a family

Obviously these take a lot of planning ahead, and might seem to be the opposite of simple. But keep in mind - I’m talking about keeping most birthdays simple, and focusing more on the traditions with the other trips.

I’d love to hear from you! Do you have any birthday party planning tips, ideas, or traditions? Our oldest is just turned 5, so we are getting excited to begin milestone birthdays!

I’ve been traveling with our kids since they were babies! I remember taking Milly to 5 different states via 4 different flights and road trips when she was just 4 months old. I flew alone and met my husband during his work training, I did a road trip to a conference with my sister, and we have done several road trips to the beach and mountains (about 3.5 hours in the car without kids). I’ve flown solo with a newly potty trained 2 year old and a 2 month old. (I was stressed, but they did awesome!) And I’ve learned lots of tricks and tips along the way.

My mantra : if it’s a short trip, KEEP IT SIMPLE. The less you can carry, the better! Narrow it down and just keep the essentials for a weekend trip. With that said, if we go on a week long trip, we bring all the things because it’s just easier in my opinion!

I know I’m not the most well traveled mama, but I figured I might as well share what I know. I hope this helps some other mamas out there!

Here are 20 Tips for
Traveling with Kids!

1. Pack for the kids 3 days before you leave!
   This will relieve so much stress. I always pack for the kids well in advance, and I pack for them before I pack for myself. You will inevitably have some last minute things you’ll need to throw in their bag (white noise machine, monitors, lovies), but having most of it done clears your mind and allows you to fill in the gaps.

2. Leave an hour earlier (at least) than you plan for.
   AT LEAST. Honestly, we aim for 2 hours earlier. Just getting out the door requires a lot. Inevitably, there will be a poopy diaper as you are loading up the car, a melt down or two, and you’ll realize, “I haven’t eaten a thing all morning and am about to pass out.” So you’ll need to stop for 5 minutes and eat something.

3. Create a master family packing list and re-use it for every single trip.
   You can download mine for free below! Just keep in mind I have 3 kids 3 and under, so it’s definitely more for the toddler + baby mama. I print this bad boy out every time we travel and work through the list. I always have a pen handy, crossing off everything as I pack it, and adding to the list if their needs change. (Our camping list is another level, but that’s for another post another time!)

4. Throw the schedule out the window on travel days.
   The sooner you embrace this, the better. I know you work SO hard to get the kids on a schedule! I do too. But schedules are meant to be flexible, and you will be less stressed if you just don’t even worry about a schedule when you travel. Your kids will get the sleep and food they need, I promise. They will bounce right back into their normal routine the next day! They will probably be even more tired and will hopefully nap even better after a travel day!

5. Choose a stroller or a Sling - not both.
   Unless you KNOW you will have a need for both of them, it’s best to choose one or the other. This especially applies to airport travel! It’s just too much to try to get through the airport with both. Commit and make it work! (I’m wearing my Solly Wrap in the photo above - my favorite baby sling for airport travel because it folds up so tight!)

6. Make a carseat plan 2 weeks in advance.
   Disregard this one for road trips, because the carseats will obviously just be in the car. But for airport travel, you have to think about this in advance. You can either check your carseats or reserve carseats in your rental car. If you have a rental car, I HIGHLY recommend the latter. Just renting a carseat is much easier than bringing your own!

7. Think of others around you first!
   I’m primarily thinking about traveling on a plane. Think about everyone else first, and just do whatever you can to keep the kids quiet! Let them sleep. Let them watch stuff. Nurse the baby. feed them gummy snacks. Let the airplane be the indulgent spot that your kids look forward to!

8. Have a diaper bag that doesn’t zip
   One time my husband suggested we take his favorite backpack as a carryon diaper bag. The night before, I told him absolutely not. He tried to make a pretty good case for it - he packed up all their things and threw it on his back and almost convinced me of how easy it’d be to carry. But when I had him practice stuffing it under the table (aka the “seat in front of him”) and getting something quickly with a screaming baby on his lap, we went right back to the open diaper bag. The key is EASY ACCESS. You want something you can easily reach into and pull out with specified pockets for snacks, pacis, and sippies. (The one pictured above is actually an Ona Camera Bag since I was traveling and shooting that trip.)

9. Don’t try to control sleeping or peeing.
   You can do little things to help, like try to keep them awake until they are in the car or on the plane, or suggest they try to use the potty before leaving. But don’t make this a big deal. If they throw a fit and don’t want to use the potty before the plane, just say “OK!” and know you might have to take them on the plane. It really isn’t the end of the world. I always say, “Let’s try, and if you do you do! If you don’t you don’t!” The bigger deal you make it, the more they will turn it into a power struggle.

10. Always pack the things you think you won’t need
    Like kids Tylenol, the thermometer, nail clippers, bandaids.

11. Just bust out the snacks
    Be sure to bring snacks they love! But seriously - don’t be afraid to bust out the snacks to keep them happy and quiet. Even if it’s within 5 minutes of leaving the house or before the plane takes off!

12. Nurse / bottle feed / give paci to babies during take off and landing, unless they are asleep.
    This helps with the pressure in their ears! No matter what time the last feeding was, I always try to nurse my baby during take off and landing. If I know he/she won’t be hungry, I try a paci, or I let him suck his fingers. The thing to remember is that is helps with ear pressure and pain, as it helps their ears to release pressure naturally. But only the sucking will do that! But if they are sleeping - LET THEM SLEEP. I’ve had plenty babies sleep all the way through landing the plane and do just great.

13. Learn to change a diaper on your lap.
    And if you don’t learn to do it ahead of time, don’t be afraid to try something new. I always change a baby’s diaper on my lap in the plane bathroom or in the front seat of my car. Just be quick!

14. Just decline beverage service on a plane.
    I always bring empty sippy cups that don’t leak in the diaper bag and buy a big Smartwater. I use the Smartwater bottle myself, and fill up the kids sippies beforehand. It’s just too stressful to have those cups on our trays - even with the lids they still can spill! (But say all the YESES to pretzels!) Also, if you bring a sippy cup with a straw that closes/opens, unscrew the lid a little & screw it back on before you open it on the airplane - or else water will go everywhere because of the change in pressure!

15. If you fly, fly Southwest.
    There are so many reasons to fly Southwest, but flying with kids is the top of my list. It’s cheap. They allow you to board after group A, no matter what your boarding group. Checked bags fly free (up to 2 per person), but you ALSO get an additional 2 baby items per child to check for free (like 1 carseat and 1 base, or 1 carseat and 1 stroller). We always fly Southwest. Plus, they are the nicest people ever!

16. Back extra onesies for the babe.
    You know why. Another mama once told me to also pack an extra shirt for yourself because you could get spit up and poop on you. I usually don’t do this to keep things simple, but I know I might need to buy a shirt in the airport if things get crazy.

17. Get a Known Travelers Number so you can always be in the TSA line!
    Look up info on how to register for a Known Travelers Number. I think it’s around $85, but in my opinion, it’s worth it. Be sure to plug it in when you book a flight!

18. Request a copy of their Birth Certificate as soon as they are born!
    We learned this the hard way. One month ago, I was packed and ready to get on a plane. I went to look for Beaufort’s birth certificate the night before, and I realized WE NEVER GOT ONE. Will had to go to an office early the next morning before their flight to pick it up! It was highly stressful and he almost wasn’t able to fly with me. So stop what you’re doing and make sure you have a copy of their birth certificate!

19. Always bring headphones for your toddler.
    This goes back to # 7! Keeping the toddler quiet is a way to love and serve those around you. We have these but are looking to buy these amazing kid headband headphones!

20. Say yes to ALL THE HELP.
    If you can plan to travel with another adult, do it! If a nice man offers to carry your bag, say yes and thank you! If a flight attendant looks friendly and you need to pee, ask if she would hold your baby! One of the most encouraging things I’ve found when flying with kids is how much people love your baby and want to help you. Complete strangers make you feel like a celebrity as you walk down the aisle of a plane. Just soak it in and say yes to all the help!

I would seriously love to hear from other traveling mamas: what are your favorite tips? Comment below!

Some links above are affiliate links! Which means I make a little money when you use my link to purchase an item, but it costs you nothing extra! Win win!

Get ready! This is a gamechanger. For you, the parent, as well as your kiddos!

It’s called “Mind Body Soul Time.”

I learned about it from an online course called Positive Parenting Solutions by my friend Amy McCready, and it’s been so incredibly helpful for our family. (PS. This is not a sponsored post - I just really believe in this course and have benefited so much from it personally!)

Here’s how it works:

Each parent gives each child 10 minutes of Mind, Body, Soul Time, twice a day, every day.

No phones.

No distractions.

The kid gets to choose how they want to spend their 10 minutes with you.

The other kids get to wait their turn.

Set a timer, and give them your COMPLETE undivided attention! Play, laugh, listen, and just be with your kid.

That’s it!

Here are the benefits we have seen:

• Milly has done less “acting out” to get attention. She knows she has our attention once or twice a day, and it has really diminished her negative behavior.

• Lyndon gets the reading and playing time that Milly got when she was her age! And honestly, that probably wouldn’t happen if it wasn’t planned into our day. Sad to say it’s true, but 2nd kids who are easy-going certainly don’t get the attention the first born kid did!

• Milly and Lyndon are less jealous / needy of their time with Mama with the new baby.

• I feel more fulfilled as a mother, knowing that even if it’s only 10 minutes, I am listening, in tune with my kids individually, and not distracted once a day.

We certainly don’t do this perfectly every day, but whenever we begin having behavior issues, we go back to this. If we consistently implement MBST for 1-2 weeks, we immediately see a difference!

As I learned from PPS, the two main psychological needs of a child are belonging and significance. When both parents give their children this undivided attention, it fills their belonging and significance buckets in a major way. When those basic needs are met,

Tip for parents of lots of kids: Aim to do this with each kid once a day instead of twice a day! Or maybe make it your weekend tradition if you can’t get it into your routine. Give yourself grace when first trying it, too. In our major life transitions (like recently having a baby), we try to do it well once a day, and we give ourselves grace when we don’t get to do it. The point is this: don’t give up and not do it at all! It’s better to have MBST with each child than having none at all!

Have you tried this before? Or do you implement something like it in your family?